I would say this post is almost an extension of “born in the wrong era” written by me in March, so if you have spare 5 minutes and enjoy reading my random thoughts, go ahead and head there before reading this ramble.
If you have been following me for a bit, you probably know I went through various stages of style in my life. Starting from the cliché tumblr aesthetic, to grunge, boho, tapping into y2k and finally emerging with my current style. Somewhere in between I also tried going into minimalism (me & minimalism still makes me laugh).
Changes are natural but all of mine are heavily documented on social media.
Let me be honest, half of those stages were heavily affected by my surrounding, ideas of who I want to become and with whom I would like to hang out. In my opinion quite superficial.
While I still believe my time at university has not offered me much in terms of education or my career development, it surely allowed me to explore every single bit of my taste and aesthetic. And I owe the birth of my baby The Disco Mag, heavily to my bachelors and support received from my amazing tutors.
And the birth of The Disco Mag highlighted a key change in me, something I have been frequently running away from (as it was deemed to be cliché), but my gigantic love for the past and music. I have spent most of my teen years befriending musicians and doing everything in my power to get as close to the behind the scenes of music. What recently reminded me of this was Viv Albertine’s autobiography in which she highlights how she was never musical and could have never imagined herself making music. A bit like me, though I am indeed quite untalented in this case, however, my lack of skills never stopped me from dreaming about becoming a musician.
In my life, I played piano, guitar and even attended singing lessons (where one of my teachers told me my voice sound as if from under a pussy and my other teacher said I sound like dying Amy Winehouse). Concluding I realised that my teenage years have been spent wanting to be surrounded by what could have been possible in the 60’s or 70’s. Aka being a groupie.
While producing The Disco I was still heavily exploring my style. I feel I was not ready to go full 70’s and “I hate everything that’s modern”, in fear of not doing this whole thing right. It almost feels as if I needed some kind of internal spiritual preparation to embrace the style I love.
And then releasing my baby to be graded for my final major project put this whole approval stamp onto my style. And I became what I believe is the near final stage of my aesthetic and personality. I’m sure I will be changing and my super spiritual, Buddhist phase is somewhere ahead of me in the future, but I can say I am for the first time comfortable with myself.
I often get asked, “So when do you know, you have found it?”. And there’s no easy answer, some people know since the day they were born and some like me go through numerous regretful stages of their style. But if I can give any advice to those who are still searching, is that you never stop and you experiment constantly. It does not stop at wearing something more daring once per month, it’s a personal development that should be continuous rather than a one-off.
I realise it all sounds super vague so I prepared a mini to do list (which sums up my self-discovery) for those who are looking for guidance.
Look constantly for inspirations
Such as new Instagram accounts to follow, different music genres and explore Pinterest (this website is deemed as a DIY heaven for stay at home mums but let’s be honest, you can find gold!). I started reading lots and lots of books and biographies of the 60’s & 70’s, this heavily inspired me in many ways.
Stop buying things that feel “safe”
Instead of buying once again the same top, try something that makes you curious and excited. Even if you think it won’t match anything you already have, trust me, if you love the piece you’ll make it work with your clothes.
Find alternatives for things that are comfortable but don’t suit your style.
My main issue appeared with comfortable daily trousers, I hated skinny jeans but I had nothing else to wear on a day to day basis. So instead of throwing them out immediately I slowly began trying different styles and substituting one pair of jeans for one pair of flares or wide trousers. I’m doing exactly the same with jackets at the moment.
Do a wardrobe clear out!
I personally do this weekly, but I still find things that were just randomly in there for 4 years and have not been worn. That’s a big no no for me unless this item has some sentimental value (like your grandfather’s jumper) or if I see an outfit being styled with it that matches my current style.
Personally, I decided to sell all of my puffer jackets, skinny jeans (I kept one pair just in case), all non-vintage jumpers, all those party bodysuits & dresses aka clubbing attire and most importantly I gave up a lot of pieces bought from chains and limited myself to keeping mostly second-hand.
Discover new places to buy clothes
For me, that meant cutting out chain stores and turning to vintage and second-hand pieces.
Start with accessories
To prevent yourself from spending all your money at once, begin with buying bit by bit accessories which you think will enhance your style. Obviously, we can’t always completely redesign our wardrobe and exchange old clothes for new, but this can be a way to start discovering a new style on a small budget.
That journey for me began with earrings and belts. I started collecting various large earrings, sparkly, gold, anything that I felt would be funky even with a black turtleneck. As of the belts, I looked at anything that was vintage or felt very rock n roll hah. But with just those two accessories I was able to use my old clothes in a new aesthetic.
Of course, I still feel as if something is missing from my style, I don’t think it’s possible to just wake up one day and be like “Hey I know for 100% what I like & what I don’t.” But at least now I can more or less exactly say what is missing from my style. My wardrobe is going through an extreme transformation and I see pieces missing that I simply cannot find or afford. Since March a lot has changed but just back then when I said I feel comfortable wearing ridiculous clothes, I can say the same today. I don’t mind people staring and talking anymore. Because all that counts is being comfortable with who you are!